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Time to Pick Your Player Scenario
Authored by Bob Souza - April 9, 2005 - 6:44 pm


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On to the playoffs! Yay.

Now that the Kings have officially grabbed their spot, it’s worth taking a birds-view peek at the major cogs in their machine. Since this year has produced a truckload of unpredictable consequences, you would have to be a swami like Carnac to even come close to predicting future performance results.

But, what the hey – why else are we here?

Disclaimer: Injury, illness, sadness, indifference or any other type of physical or mental mood deviation on the part of the player shall duly invalidate projected scenarios.

Mike Bibby

What we’d like to see: A semblance of the remarkable player we saw from a couple of months ago; taking charge of the offense, replacing sloppy passes with clean ones, drilling regular threes, and hitting every needed clutch shot. That’s all.

What we’d hate to see: An exhausted, impotent point guard, unable to regain his shooting touch, making pointless errant passes in a desperate attempt to create something – anything.

What we’ll probably see: An occasional electrifying swish of a 3, short bursts of scoring followed by inexplicable dry spells -- and unreliable clutch shooting. The man has got to be tired.

Cuttino Mobley

What we’d like to see: A spectacular outside threat, who is able to get to the basket often and successfully. A guy that drops a blanket on every 2-guard he faces.

What we’d hate to see: Suddenly can’t buy a basket, fires 17-foot air-balls, and hits the side of the board with regularity. A grinning opponent lights him up from everywhere.

What we’ll probably see: Around his normal 16 a game with a sporadic huge night, some big 3-pointers and various nifty left-hand jumpers. Plus more additions to his technical-fouls collection.

Peja Stojakovic

What we’d like to see: Unending 3-point bombs shredding nets to complement varied and marvelous drives, and an emerging robust physicality responsible for an expression of colossal awe from Sir Charles.

What we’d hate to see: Extended periods of “no touches”, and absolutely zero screens “when touches”. Guarding anyone who is more than an inch taller, or 3 pounds heavier.

What we’ll probably see: A continuance of inconsistent shooting – velvety long-range missiles that barely ripple the cords, followed by disgustingly wide-open efforts that clank off the rim submissively. Out-muscled at every turn, but as good as gold from the foul stripe.

Brian Skinner

What we’d like to see: Monster rebounding at both goals, accentuated by a scary, intimidating defensive presence. Opportunity shots that fall into the hoop with astounding monotony.

What we’d hate to see: Flamboyant matador defense on anyone with a dissimilar jersey. Hands of stone for any episode pertaining to the ball.

What we’ll probably see: Irregular rebounding, shooting and defense – but oh so very happy to be away from Philly and “The Answer”.

Kenny Thomas

What we’d like to see: See Skinner, Brian.

What we’d hate to see: See Skinner, Brian.

What we’ll probably see: See Skinner, Brian.

Brad Miller

What we’d like to see: The axis of the offense again, whipping passes to attentive cutting teammates, hitting his own elbow jumpers, and knocking people flat on their rears. All accompanied by his obligatory scowl.

What we’d hate to see: His large body lodged on the bench, modeling more designer suits.

What we’ll probably see: A guy gamely trying to shake off considerable rust, finding himself a step late, way too often.

Bobby Jackson

What we’d like to see: That old familiar passion, propelling the team to unbelievable heights with his slashing, fiery style. Twenty minutes a game would be fine.

What we’d hate to see: Him in street clothes, next to Miller.

What we’ll probably see: Anybody’s guess.

El Bencho

What we’d like to see: Greg Ostertag in shape, planting his big body inside and stopping those easy layups; Eddie House continuing to blister from the outside; Maurice Evans with more acrobatic drives, athletic dunks and superb defense; Darius Songaila making smart passes to go with strong offensive boarding; Corliss Williamson pushing people out of the paint constantly, and scoring his little cripples; Kevin Martin hitting every shot he’s lucky enough to get.

What we’d hate to see: Turnovers, along with more turnovers and loads of missed shots. No enthusiasm for the regulars during timeouts. Excessive girl-watching.

What we’ll probably see: More of what we’ve already seen.

Bonus scenario – Rick Adelman

What we’d like to see: Brilliant inbound plays, bordering on genius. Timely, conceptual substitutions. A consistently excited, motivated and disciplined group of individuals.

What we’d hate to see: A team mass mutiny, including derisive mocking during timeouts, leading to an impolite coach-choking incident at practice.

What we’ll probably see: Questionable player exchanges, a general void of creative play-calling, and ever so many pained expressions to the officials. But an agreeable conductor who allows his band to perform.